Review: I Suck at Girls by Justin Halpern

Title: I Suck at Girls
Author: Justin Halpern
Published: May 15, 2012
Pages: 180
Genre: Humor/Autobiography
Source: Publisher (Harper Collins)
Rating: C+
Reviewed by: Marq

Favorite quote: "Well, I'm up, and my morning just took a left turn into a pile of dog shit, so you might as well tell me what has you picking my lock."


summary from Goodreads
The story begins when Justin takes his dad out to lunch to announce that he's decided to propose to his girlfriend.

"You've been dating her for four years," his dad replies. "It ain't like you found a parallel fucking universe."

But eventually he gives Justin some advice: that he should take a day off and think back over everything he's learned in life about women, relationships, and himself before making his decision. And that's just what Justin does--revisiting everything from his disastrous childhood crushes to the night he finally lost his virginity while working as a dishwasher at Hooters.

"I Suck at Girls" is full of his dad's patented brand of wisdom. But it's also full of new characters just as funny as his dad--from his brother, who provides insights into wedding night rituals ("You stand in one corner of the room, and she stands in the other. You each take off one piece of clothing at a time") to his first boss, who warns Justin to man up: "That's what a man does. He takes his shots and then he scrubs the shit out of some dishes." The result is a pilgrim's progress through the landscape of sex and love--by one of the funniest writers at work today.

---

Marq's thoughts:
I Suck at Girls is a hilarious recount of Justin Halpern's unsuccessful attempts with girls. The book starts off with Justin telling his dad that he's going to propose to his girlfriend and then Justin's story is told through flashbacks. The first half of the book is beyond hilarious. The star of the book is Justin's dad and his no-nonsense way of telling the truth. He doesn't mince words or try to be politically correct in order to not hurt anyone's feelings.

My favorite chapter is "I Like It" where Justin likes Kerry Thomason and because he likes her, he decides to do what boys do and start picking on her. When he draws an offensive picture of Kerry and gets sent to the principal's office, I laughed so hard I had tears in my eyes.

For me the best parts of the book were when Justin was a kid. As the book progressed and you saw his interactions with women as a teen and an adult, they became less funny and kinda sad. There were still some funny moments but they didn't make me laugh like the first half of the book.

I Suck At Girls is a fun, quick read. The dad is amazingly funny and steals the show. I loved how the book starts in the present and then goes back to show how Justin ended up as an adult in a relationship. I recommend this book if you're looking for a quick, funny read. And if you enjoyed Sh*t My Dad Says, you'll definitely enjoy this book.